Marriage, God's Way

Marriage, God's Way

Marriage is the concept that God created since the beginning of time. God had provided answers to every problem known to man, their found in the book we called the Bible. Many marriages are in trouble because we fail to follow the teachings written in the Scriptures. We need to go back to applying God's principles, so we may have successful marriages, and watch families grow, develop and become a powerful witness of God's love in the earth.

One of the ideas that have destroyed the institution of marriage is that men and women are equal. When God created the earth and the beautiful creations in it, he completed his creation of the earth by made man in his image and his likeness. We read God’s account of man creation in the book of Genesis, but he was a long. The Creator of the universe spoke, "It is not good for man to be alone", God created him a wife. God put Adam into a deep sleep and removed one his rib, from that rib he created a woman. The Creator brought before Adam the woman he created. I think the best translation would be something like this when Adam saw Eve. His first expression was (WOW), in his divine wisdom he created a person totally different from Adam. She looked different, acted different, and responded to life in a different way. She was the exact opposite of Adam. A man, and a woman in God's mathematics are the complete reflection of God. Men and women are never equal one is not better than the other. They were created for different purposes.

One day I was passing by a woman who was on the job with a bunch of other men. She was running a jackhammer. On the inside, I begin to weep for her, someone have lied to her telling she could do anything a man could do. I know that her body will break down much quicker than the male, simply from the fact that God created man to be physically stronger. The man is not better that a woman, the woman is not better that a man, God have given them different function. Imagine a man trying to carry a child; he is not physically designed for childbirth. One of the most beautiful things I have seen was the birth of my son. The coming forth of a life was remarkable, yet I would have probably died on the spot trying to give birth to a child. That does not make the woman better or less than a man. It is just her God-given design to give birth to life. It is when we begin to work within the framework of the creator's original plan that we understand the structure that God intended for the family. God's definition of marriage is one man and one woman. This has been since the beginning of time any other redefinition detours from the plan of God.

I was listening to a radio broadcast, and the radio commentator asked the woman what was her occupation. Her answer, I am just a housewife. Speaking in a tone like her occupation was a degraded profession. We have permitted others to redefine what God had intended from the very beginning of time. She did not realize her occupation was the greatest upon earth because it is initiated by God himself. The conception of the woman movement was misguided. Saying that man and women are equal misrepresent the creator intentions. It is true that women can do many things, and by no means do we discount that. They make excellent lawyers, doctors, teachers, and scientists. Fulfilling their obligation of her God-given calling is by no means a second-class occupation.

I will probably get letters and e-mails from those who disagree with me, even from some of my Christian brothers and sisters. Nevertheless that does not change the purpose of God.

Men and women need to understood their God-given roles and responsibilities, many of the problems we see today would simply not exist. Head Start is not God's plan for your family. The responsibility of raising children is the father and mother. Not passing our children off to some stranger, that we may pursue our own selfish desires. Occupations have become primary, and the raising of our children has become secondary. The enemy plan was clear, take control of our children under the disguise of education. They are teaching the children their ways and concepts, canceling out in the children minds biblical principles and teaching. We have lost just about a whole generation, and if something is not done soon we are on the verge of losing another generation. I will not forget the day that my second oldest son, came home from high school and told he believed abortion was okay. I have not been able to change his mind all of these years. It was then I begin to realize I have placed my children in the hands of my enemies, and they were winning the battles for their minds. We as Christians must have our own institutions of learning. Yes, the established educational system will fight that purpose as hard as they can. We are left with no other alternative, we must turn the tide and win the minds of our children.

I was speaking at a conference, and I made a statement and my whole audience became unusually quiet. "If we were to follow biblical principles there would be no sexual diseases in the earth." Scientists are searching for medical solutions to many of the sexual diseases that plague mankind. While this is noble, it makes us realize how far we are from the model that God has intended. One of the greatest gifts given to mankind by his Creator was sex. This powerful gift was to be maintained within the framework of marriage. The physical relationship is the only thing that can make a man and a woman totally one, spiritually, mentally, and physically. God said, "they shall be one", this is far more reaching than just the physical expectation of the relationship. That is why he created marriage to be for a lifetime, he knew that such powerful emotional, spiritual, and mental bonds can be created in only in a lifetime relationship setting. Divorce breaks God's intended purposes for this lifetime relationship, yes there are some cases where it may be necessary for divorce, but it should be the abnormal, not the normal. I was asked to do a marriage ceremony by a young couple, they wrote their own vows. I noticed they left out a significant part of it. When I required what was their reason, they said it was old-fashioned, and nothing lasts forever. I recommended that they find someone to do the marriage ceremony, who agreed with that kind of thinking. They were destroying the marriage before it began, they are searching for a way out, before they found the way in. Marriage is not a contract as we think of the term contract, but marriage is a covenant between a man and a woman and God.

The Creator of all mankind would certainly have the right advice to give us concerning the institution we call marriage. Let us look at the instructions God gave to the men and women. He gave this instruction to every man, "men love your wife", and to the women he gave the instruction "women respect your husband". Here are two powerful concepts that will help develop a lasting relationship. Men ought to “love” their wives, as Christ loved the church. Christ loves the church so much he was willing to die for it. Also, Christ gave the husband the instructions to love his wife as his own body. These are two powerful examples of godly love. Love does not seek what it can get for itself, but what it can give to others. Love is always giving, always searching how it can give more than it gave before. Love is the only thing that can be constantly given away, but will never run out. The greatest investment a man can make in his marriage is learning to give love on the same level as Christ gave to the church. The second example of this is for a man to love his wife as his own body. This type of love is never abusive, overly physical, or harshly spoken toward her in any way. How many men are physically abusive to themselves? A man that physically abused himself is mentally unstable. In the same way, a man will respect his own body, care for it and nurture it, is instructed to do the same toward his wife. Once during a marriage counseling session, a man spoke of his wife in such negative terms, that I asked him to speak concerning himself in the same negative way. He looked at me and said "you have to be kidding there is no way in the world I would speak about myself like that". Speaking negative about his wife, he was speaking negative about himself. They are no more two, but one. He was quite stunned, and it took him a little time to recover. He understood the definition of love as not what he could get, but what he could give, it changed their marriage. There would be no such thing as physical abuse, or verbal abuse if a man truly loves his wife as he loves himself.

Now the loving Creators speech to women; "respect your husband, and highly regard him". The book of Proverbs talks about a wise woman, "a women can build her house with her tongue, or she can tear it down". Her words will either build her a castle, or make her live in the slums of despair. This is old-fashioned to many, and not politically correct. Yet this is a formula that will build a happy home, and a lasting and loving relationship. Men need to be respected, and regarded by the wife as a special person the God have put in their lives. The woman respect and regard her husband will see that he is willing to sacrifice for the comfort of his wife and family. This seems to be simple, but yet, very powerful. God has places in the woman the ability to build and encourage her husband and help him to reach new heights.

It would be difficult in just one writing to teach all the principles needed to make a loving and lasting relationship. I hope some of the principles mentioned here will help husbands and wives to have a better understanding of God's Divine plan for marriage.

Ronald H. Flowers